it's your birthday...

it's your birthday,
it's not mine.
don't let me ruin your day,
it might make you blind.

if I ruin your day,
and you are getting blind,
I should run away,
as if I'm still in your mind.

When I run away,
but I'm still in your mind,
what can I say,
I'm not that kind.

but I say nothing,
show I ain't important,
birds start singing,
for the unexpectable inheritance.

and the unexpectable inheritance
drives the bird to sing,
I have to say this but not often,
I'm going out from your ring.

happy niu Year!

it's still the same,
only on number,
not the year.
start with number two,
followed by two zeros,
if last year we've five at the end,
this year we add up one
so that it will be six.

Come here, Rain!

Come, come here rain

Come, come here, rain
I’m waiting for your drops
Since yesterday.
But none has reached my top
Nor my bones.
I’m waiting for you
My hope’s glimmering
Hope you’re not disappointing.

Sun has shown up
Wind has blown up
But why you are still hidin’?
I’m waiting for you
I’m waiting for you
Stop asking me
Why I’m waiting.
Only me myself have
The answer for that question.

Come here, come here, rain.
Don’t let me blubberin’.

24^th Dec 2005

“Gimme break!”

By now, I’m unable to think,
My mind is blocked.
Working since early morning
Breakfast with nothing.
My brain is starving
In front of TV I’m watching.
Please, help me!
I need a break
I need a rest.
My eyes are tired enough
Staring the sparkling monitor.
My sleepy fingers
suddenly cry without tears,
“Gimme break!!”
I reply,
“Hey, I still have another two
to be finished!...so, wake up!!”

3:08 pm

Gadis bertudung biru

Dan di perpisahan yang akhir itu kita berjanji, jadikan
pertemuan semula ini satu permulaan baru, benarlah katamu
gadis bertudung biru. Walau sedasawarsa jarak kita,
kenangan lama terhakis tiada, kisah baru dikongsi bersama.
Adapun kisah lama kita ada yang diingat-ingat lupa,
Namun tiap kali berbicara ada saja cerita suka, gelak ketawa,
terhambur segala kalut, hilang segala macam rindu. Gadis
bertudung biru, punya cerita kita berbeza, cita cinta rasa dan segala,
serupanya tiada walau sekelumit cuma. Beda kita dalam segala,
namun ketawa bisa dikongsi bersama, benarkan kataku
gadis bertudung biru. Gadis bertudung biru,
ceritaku di mindamu, ceritamu di mindaku. Apa yang kita
hafal hari ini bakal kita lafazkan di pertemuan yang
entah esok, entah lusa.Alis warna penghidupan menanti kita di hadapan,
ayuh kita langkah beriringan, semoga kaki kita satu derapan,
menuju masa depan penuh harapan.

17th December 2005
11.33 am

Cinta Kalin

Cinta Kalin
(sebuah refleksi filem Ungu-Violet)

Sukarnya hidup dengan sejarah berbuku di dada,
Kerana yang di depan mata mungkin terima akibatnya.
Kasih, sayang dan cinta terkorban begitu sahaja,
Tanpa ada usaha selamatkannya.
Dan biarkan hati, jiwa dan minda sengsara.
Ada insan mencintai namun dielak seikhlas hati
Semuanya kerana hidup berbuku sejarah di dada.
Abaikan insan menaruh hati dengan terpaksa
Insan terabai faham tidak masalah menimpa.
Insan terabai rasa ditipu dianiaya.
Mengapa tiada yang mahu terima?
Anggap suka-suka menolaknya
Memori tidak akan padam musnah hilang
Kewarasan dan pertimbangan berbekal ada.

Benarlah kata sang pujangga
Amatlah pedih menyakiti insan yang kita cintai
Amatlah sedih melukai insan yang kita sayangi
Namun bukannya dibuat tanpa periksa
Semua bersebab yang sekecil cuma.

the bystander II

The bystander
leans to the wall of hearts,
thinking of The Sweet Little Lady
he met years ago.
The girl never talks by lips,
But he always believe
they’re talking and listening
by heart.
(now, he’s smiling but,
his smile isn’t returned)

The bystander
took an immediate move,
made a confession of love
with a glimmer of hope
it would be reciprocated.
(and yes, it is accepted!)

The bystander,
thrilled and extremely delighted
now and every single time,
he’s glittered with happiness.

Day by day,
week by week,
they’re sailing smoothly
on the Titanic of Love,
through the sea of Passion.
But months after
the confession was made,
The Sweet Little Lady
left the bystander alone
with reasons of
mind-boggling complexity.

The bystander,
astonished and stunned,
surprised and traumatized,
and totally upset
as it’s the most shocking moment
he ever had in his life.

The bystander now,
sits facing a fireplace,
watching his heart
slowly kindled.

9^th Dec 2005
myHome

hujan

titis-titismu
basahkan bumi,
segarkan tanah,
bangunkan kami
dari lena siang
yang panjang.

titis-titismu
kami biarkan berlaku.
jika lebat, lebatlah.
jika renyai, renyailah.
tiada daya kami melawan,
apa lagi menahan
cukup sekadar mendoakan
kesejahteraan.

titis-titismu
gusarkan hati-hati kami
bila akan berhenti
menjadi rahsia abadi.
kerana ketika kau basahi bumi,
jam mentari tiada lagi berfungsi
jam minda tiada upaya mengira.

titis-titismu
kata orang,
bak air mata. benarkah?

I can’t share my heart with you.

It’s forever single
And of course never be
more than this.
Yes, I can divide it
No, it’s not for you.
I will share mine
But sorry,
I will never share it
with you.

Mine is red, Yours is blue,
It’s fated, I will never be with you.

30^th Nov 2005

a night to remember

it's a stupid discussion
in a night to remember
(fine if you have forgotten),
my words' sweet
my soul's exposed
my heart winced
my mind's wedged
unable to control my lips
I began to speak
unclearly and softly.

it's a night to remember
as it's a night for us
expressing the sensation
ignoring the numbness
and anything and anybody
and else.

fine if you have forgotten
it's not that important
to remember this night
if you don't remember
we don't need to fight
to prove who is right.

I began to speak
softly and unclearly
to admit
I'm damn guilty.

apa dah jadi?

lidah kelu
mata kuyu
tengok langit
diam bisu.
dada sesak
hidung sempit
tengok ladang
daun layu.
kaki pijak
tangan sepak
tengok rumah
kayu api.
hati mati
otak mati
apa dah jadi
pada diri ini?